Now, I know we are well past the new year timing; however, it’s good to think back to what you said to yourself and make a mental note of what you’ve done that adds merit to what you said you were going to do. One key way that I try to ensure that I’m remaining true to my “resolutions” is to assign a word to my year. My word of this year, which I promptly decided on in late December 2022, has been “connect”; which, when you see that word, may not spark all that much. However, the word connect has a really powerful meaning for me. First and foremost it’s a verb, an action word; its meaning is “to bring together” or “to create access”. It’s a profound word choice for me in particular, because my word choice for 2022 was “manifest”. Again, I love choosing verbs as my words of the year as in the nature of these words there’s action attached. I just feel so strongly that “manifest” and “connect” are so beautifully paired for each other for consecutive years — especially with the experiences I’ve had!
I look back on 2022 and realize I was in a pretty delicate place. I was working for a company that left me with so little to give to anyone else (including my family and myself). Our world was still in the throws of recovering from the COVID-19 pandemic, and burnout was everywhere. I was pretty unhealthy as a result of trying to balance being a newer mom and working full time in a very thankless place. I clung onto my word “manifest” though. I knew that somehow by trying to reframe my mindset would help change my life from a place of lack to a place of abundance. I was tired of living in a scarcity mindset. I was done putting limits on myself.
Fast forward to now, I’ve become a little more confident at being a parent (although it’s still my life’s greatest work and challenge — also the most rewarding). I’ve been working as a pharmacist at a new company for the past 6 months which has allowed me a much healthier work-life balance. I’ve also taken big steps to reclaim my body and my health as both have been a struggle for me. I had been attempting to ignore symptoms for quite a while and eventually got so frustrated that I did decide to speak up, which was not an easy thing for me to do… that’s a whole other can-of-worms, though! I’m finally in a place though where I feel like I’m getting some “footing” so-to-speak. Now, in the past, I would have been afraid to say that, let alone write it down for the world to read. I would have been worried about jinxing myself and then the wrath would be released upon me and my life. Again, that was a scarcity mindset… I’m here now to say that I am making progress. I’m taking the steps necessary to better myself and my life. I’m done playing corporate games and climbing social or other structural ladders to be accepted. I’m moving forward as myself and I’m not afraid to make the connection.
I think for a long time I’ve been a little bit afraid of making connections. Why? I’m not really sure. I guess because change can be scary. Sometimes success is scary, and failure is definitely scary — terrifying even. I think I have caged myself up for too long though. I don’t want to be afraid of success anymore, and I want to be optimistic (even if it is cautious optimism) of failure. Truly, when I look back on what has allowed me to feel connectivity is participating in the “1% better” mindset. I know my last post was about my petrification of not doing things in an absolutely “perfect” manner. Now, I’m looking at things in a different way. Instead of choosing not to do something because I can’t do it perfectly, I choose to act in a way that’s 1% better than I was the previous day. Again, see my last post for more information of what that process has been like of giving up the scarcity/perfectionist tendencies. Also, I greatly urge you to read “Atomic Habits” by James Clear. This book is something I’ll most likely carry with me for the rest of my life as it helped me to even become familiar with the “1% better” path.
Overall, what I am trying to get across is that our lives don’t happen by accident. Even though we may not have control over what is going to happen, we do have 100% control over our response. To make the appropriate connection has been paramount in my mental health and I hope that this post will make a little sense to someone else… Our lives aren’t meant to be lived with an attitude of scarcity.. Even when everything feels negative, turn back to see how far you’ve come. Manifest the things that will bring you abundance and then make the connections that allow those manifestations to become a reality. Have an idea of who you want to be? Act like the person you hope to become right now, and eventually you’ll wake up one day and recognize that you’ve become that person. It doesn’t take a huge overnight change — and let’s face it, those aren’t even sustainable anyway. It’s about the tiniest drop, the one step, the one breath, the one choice added up each hour, each day, each week, each month, etc. Free yourself from the big picture, and just take the one step. It’s just like one of those 1000 piece puzzles… each little connection will eventually build something so amazing, you won’t hardly believe it.
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